The Storm Before The Calm

The last hill has been climbed, the last mile run... sort of.  Friday, Saturday & Sunday of this weekend were awesome outstanding.  Highlights:

Mutha's Trip Reports:
Friday:  tMail, DogMan & I rode a 72 miler through the Northeast Kingdom, departing from my house (due to Dogman's strict rule that you don't drive to a ride).

• Mile 35:  Parker Pie at the top of the climb up Bean Road in West Glover
• Pizza and cokes and an hour of leisurely chit-chat
• Mile 37:  Bread & Puppet Theater Museum.  DogMan's head didn't explode.  tMail felt the pressure building.

Saturday:  g-$$$, MadDog, tMail, Spanky The Wonder Dog and I on a relatively casually-paced 12 miler from Lincoln to the App Gap along the spine of the Green Mountains.

• Got to see both sides of both gaps.
• Was astounded to discover that not all reasonable people consider the same side to be the 'hard' side.
• Encountered a couple doing the 6-Gaps ride.  They were on gap 4 (at 5pm).
• Topics covered:  love, life, death, bike components, 1-Acre intensive farming, jets, planes, gannett, sheep, goats, fencing, bikes, relationships, money, fuel, bikes, tires, bikes, troubleshooting bike problems, bikes, ... um, etc.

Sunday:  tMail and I cranked out the Burke Mtn Auto Road while DogMan cranked the 'Maple Corners' loop by bike.  Arrived at the top of Burke Mtn (2000' ascent) about a minute apart (w/ tMail running like a gazelle on a casual tour, and me tromping like a rhino in labor).  We did it in 33 and 34 min respectively, but tMail could easily hit 30 min if he pushed like I did.  We got back to Danville, loaded up the dogs, and took a 1:26 run through the Danville Town Forest, up and over Pumpkin Hill, up and over the next hill, took the LVRT for a mile, then Pumpkin Hill Road up a steep ascent, then back up the unnamed hill and back and over Pumpkin hill.  Huh?  Let's put it this way:  nothing but hills the whole time.  Mileage?  Unknown.  Maybe 6.

Final damage:

• Bodies everywhere
• Broke DogMan (joke)
• Broke Jake & Spanky
• Broke tMail's tent
• I thought I was going to crash hard on Sunday, but took a long shower to get the accumulated sweat/salt off.  Felt better.  Took care of some chores around the house and pounded in a few cedar posts.
• tMail is gentleman:  bought pizza for everyone (in Danville) and financed the food supply for treks.
• DogMan is a gentleman:  picked up the tab at Parker Pie.
• Mutha is a mooch:  accepted the favors graciously, ate his fill, and shook some hands.

Now to chill for a few days and prepare for Gannett.

tMail's Trip Reports:

I arrived in Danville on Thursday and was immediately transported to the CSA to pick the Mutha Share of food. I met Mimi who is a smoking chick who owns the farm and would probably beat all of us arm wrestling. She said I can come to the farm anytime and she would put me to "work". I accepted maybe fall time. 

I was then transported back to Mutha training facility and into a truck with Shirley the chicken, Sue and Jill for the next 2 hours.  I was taken to a farm and met Ann Mary who raises Jacobs sheep and has built a compound that David Koresh would be proud of. I then had a double date with Sue and Jill at Positive Pie.

Thursday night we planned a ride to ride (DogMan, Mutha and me) north to Glover and stop at Parker Pie and pick up chicks with the Glover edge! We also sat next to the band R.E.M.

Then my Jedi training really began as I had to use Jedi mind tricks at the Bread and Puppet Theater which is a walk back in time to the 60s and 70s or the land of Oz take your pick. My favorite puppet was the giant silver face looked like the Tin Man that represented an Atomic Bomb and a sign that said "Shoot them". Honey's everywhere and they invited the three of us dressed in spandex costume cycling outfits to a party at 8.30pm.

Mutha is a machine on a bike and DogMan is like Cancellera during Paris Roubouix I had to time trial for about 10k at 35mph to catch but he freaked out Sunday saying he needs to ride more and didn't come with us to Burke.  After the ride we went to the DogMan system and had some Sierra Nevada's, talked about farming. If the CIA, FBI, KGB or KKK is ever after you hide out at DogMans 100 acres of coolness!

Saturday was our Green Mountain assault from Lincoln to App Gap (G$$$, DogMan, Buttercup, Mutha and me). They took me via car after the hike on the Gaps and apparently MadDog aka Buttercup is going to do a 6 Gaps ride and be done with training for D2R2. Hike was great I could not name one peak except there was a hot blonde on one summit and teenager on another with pink shorts that were painted on her. Vermont Girls!

Sunday we tried talking DogMan into not doing his Maple Corners ride but coming with us to sacrifice ones self on the run up Burke Mtn, DogMan retreated and Mutha and I forged forward. Burke Mtn auto road is a beast but can be dissected and destroyed for under 30 minutes. Mutha is a machine!

When you thought it was over we ran for 1 hour 20 minutes through the Florida everglades in Danville it was awesome!

Things learned:

Molly the goat is an alien or yoda
DogMan does not drive to bike starts
Meth users work at Marty's
Parker Pie and Positive Pie are far out.
Mutha is a machine similar to energizer bunny but better.
DogMan can be brainwashed.
G$$$ nobody works and plays harder.
MadDog's training method train around your weaknesses in that case everyone sit on your couch and don't move!
Jake the Dog had his heart ripped out him.
Spanky the Wonder Dog was sacked like Napoleon's army.

If you want to get in shape in 72 hours go to the Mutha's Jedi Camp.
Sue is a saint and she gave me a Sue Zucker original painting that is VERY cool.

Close to 100 miles covered all weekend on bike and foot.

Mutha thanks for everything next stop Gannett!